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Good writing has a that is disrupted by the insertion of superfluous words. Most writing can benefit from revision with an eye to reduction. Below is an example.
I could see Old John's face by the light of the lamp as we pitched wildly in the skiff, wind and sea spray beating loudly on the oiled tarp stretched above. The violent squall held us hostage in the tiny cove, the jagged shore and growing surf denying us respite, though we would survive the night if the anchor held.
The old Aleut stared into my eyes as I shivered from the cold. I smelled the whiskey on his breath as he opened his mouth, his lips motionless ashis words cut cleanly through the squall. “What ya gonna do kid, make a picture of yerself playing the game and hang it on yer front door, then go inside and do yer business while the game plays you?”
The dream had come again the night before, and I considered its meaning while I worked piling the net. The loud scream of hydraulics shook me from my reverie, and I refocused my attention on the task at hand as the huge bag of fish was pulled tight alongside, water pouring through the webbing…